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Family Life, the Universe and Everything with a Latte on the Side

Time to Make The #Mommitment. No More Mum Wars Any More. Or Dads. Or Carers. No More!

Monday, 17 August 2015

Children releasing balloons into the sky

This was taken on the Tubblet’s last day at Junior school.  Three classes made up of approximately 90 children. They wrote their hopes and dreams on a balloon and let them go.

Meeting them, you can tell the ones who are cheeky, shy, confident, outgoing, academic, sporty, practical … You can tell the ones who’ve been bought up to be well mannered, polite, considerate of others … etc.

What you can’t tell is the ones who were bottle or breast feed.  Who co-slept until aged one or had their own room from birth.  Had parents who practiced attachment parenting or the other sort.  Who was weaned on purees or real food.  Which ones were born via Cesarean or vagina or … or … Whatever the latest battle ground of the parenting wars, once the child is out and about, you can’t tell.  Not at all.  However hard you look.  Sorry.  No visible differences at all.  


Maybe a t-shirt?!  

My name is the Tubblet.
Bottle Fed.
Working mum and (ex)-stay at home dad.
Loves Lego.
Wants a puppy.

Which makes me wonder, how much any of these things actually matters?!  As long as a child is loved, fed, encouraged and nurtured; disciplined fairly and given boundaries; safe and isn’t ill-treated or belittled, does it really matter how any of this is done?  Probably not.

Is it anyone else’s business?  No it isn’t.

Should we feel ashamed of our choices?  No.  We're doing the best we can in our particular circumstances.

Are people who berate or shame others in person or online for not making the same parental choices as them just bullies?  Yes they are!  Less fearless warrior and defender of …More tiresome, small, minded, bullying busybody.  Who really needs to get over themselves and find a life.  Offer advice if you want, but accept other people’s right to get on with the job in their own way.  

Children releasing balloons into the air

Ultimately, we’re all on the same side.  Mothers. Fathers.  Parents.  Carers. We all want the same thing.  Happy, well-adjusted children.  We're all doing it differently.  And we're all doing it right. We are all the best people to look after our children.  

And, why, after Tayla’s post over at Motherhood The Real Deal, I’m making the #mommitment.  (Or, in my case, the mummitment).  

Are you with me?!  Make the #mommitment too.  Dads welcome too.  Read the manifesto, sign the petition,  follow them on twitter and to grab the button.  Or, at the very least, bite your tongue next time someone says something about their parenting choices that you don't agree with.  Let's do this thing!

No More Mum Wars Any More!  Or Dads.  Or Carers.  No More!

Can anyone come up with positive things to say about the endless Mum Wars?!  Anyone?!   Anyone?!  Thought not ...


Next Life, NO Kids


[ETA: The T&Cs.  We don't need the parenting fascist groove thing, but I accept the need for it to exist if your parenting choices impact others.  For example:  You may believe in free expression and no boundaries. I believe my child has the right to wander about the playground without being punched in the face or having stuff snatched from her.  And vaccinations.  These are not an optional extra, but a matter of life and death.  Literally].


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Posted by Tubbs

59 comments

  1. K's Mum17 August 2015 at 12:31

    well said! great post! :) #mummymomday

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    1. Tubbs17 August 2015 at 20:11

      Thank for the lovely comment. Writing this was very cathartic

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  2. Unknown17 August 2015 at 13:03

    Thanks lots and well said! I agree xx

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    1. Tubbs17 August 2015 at 20:12

      My pleasure! Thank you for the lovely comment too

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  3. Nicola/Simply Homemade17 August 2015 at 21:36

    Brilliant post, couldn't agree more #mummymonday
    Nicola xx

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    1. Tubbs18 August 2015 at 21:39

      Thank you

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  4. yespeasmumma18 August 2015 at 03:52

    Great idea, and post! I will check #mommitment out :)

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    1. Tubbs18 August 2015 at 21:41

      Yay! It's an excellent idea. Anything that stops the endless sniping!

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  5. Izzie Anderton18 August 2015 at 09:26

    Very well said. I have no idea why mums judge one another over their parental choices and have always thought that life's tough enough as it is. I love the idea of #mommitment x

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    1. Tubbs18 August 2015 at 21:42

      It's an excellent idea. The endless mummy wars are just exhausting and, you're right, life is tough enough!

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  6. Unknown18 August 2015 at 10:32

    Well said. Yes, all these choices seem huge at the time, but the truth is that they are all acceptable choices and they all fade into insignificance as the child grows up. Lovely post. #twinklytuesday

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    1. Tubbs18 August 2015 at 21:43

      Thank you

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  7. Unknown18 August 2015 at 17:56

    yay! Let's get #mommitment mummitment ized. Did that make sense? I'm always saying how the Mom Wars span the globe, not only does it happen in the U.S. Thanks for spreading the word! Oh and I love baby t-shirt idea with their life deets! jejeje so cute.

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    1. Tubbs18 August 2015 at 21:44

      It was my pleasure. It's a brilliant idea

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  8. Unknown18 August 2015 at 17:57

    oh, #twinklytuesday!!!

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  9. Natalie18 August 2015 at 20:10

    well said!! We are all mums at the end of the day, we love our kids and thats all that should matter!

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    1. Tubbs18 August 2015 at 21:45

      So true! Our love for our kids is all that matters

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  10. Amy Johnson18 August 2015 at 21:10

    Great post! TFS!

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    1. Tubbs18 August 2015 at 21:45

      Thank you

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  11. Unknown18 August 2015 at 21:52

    Very well said. Great to see such a positive social media campaign on this very topic. I'm off for a nosey right now :)

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    1. Tubbs19 August 2015 at 21:41

      It's such a cool idea! Happy noseying!

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  12. Unknown19 August 2015 at 11:25

    Yay for mommitment. I'm with you x

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    1. Tubbs19 August 2015 at 21:45

      Yay! Always good to have buddies onside!

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  13. Unknown19 August 2015 at 13:02

    Great post! Let's hear it for #Mommitment! x

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    1. Tubbs19 August 2015 at 21:50

      Yay! Thank you for introducing me to the movement

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  14. Unknown19 August 2015 at 13:04

    P.S. stopping by again from #bestandworst but showing you general love for this also! x

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    1. Tubbs19 August 2015 at 21:53

      Thank you for the general love. Makes the world go round

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  15. Spectrum Mum19 August 2015 at 13:41

    I'm with you here. Isn't this after all about accepting difference. #MMWBH

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    1. Tubbs19 August 2015 at 21:53

      Yes, it is and realising that difference is okay :)

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  16. LittleOandme19 August 2015 at 18:15

    Very well said! I really see no need to judge others, it serves no purpose!
    x

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    1. Tubbs19 August 2015 at 21:57

      What you said. It serves no purpose and it doesn't help anyone. Thanks for commenting

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  17. Unknown19 August 2015 at 20:19

    Great post, such a great point. #bestandworst

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    1. Tubbs19 August 2015 at 21:59

      Thank you for commeting

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  18. Unknown20 August 2015 at 03:08

    Awesome post! Thanks for linking up with #Alittlebitofeverything! Have a great night!

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    1. Tubbs20 August 2015 at 12:52

      Thank you for hosting each week! Hope you're having a lovely day

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  19. Michelle20 August 2015 at 15:48

    Right on! I actually saw another type of mom war on Facebook last night that I'm planning on writing about because it is so ridiculous. Thanks for sharing this! Visiting from #happyquacks

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    1. Tubbs21 August 2015 at 21:12

      My pleasure! Let me know when you've written your post as the more people that speak out about the stupidly of this, the better! :) Thank you for the lovely comment

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  20. Unknown21 August 2015 at 10:25

    Very well said! Totally agree on everything you said... It doesn't matter how we choose to bring up our kids, what's important is we give the best for them making them grow as a better individual. Thanks for sharing! Such a beautifully written post! #momsterslink

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    1. Tubbs21 August 2015 at 21:18

      Thank you for the lovely comment and for visiting. Totally agree with you about what's important

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  21. Emily Twin Mummy and Daddy21 August 2015 at 17:09

    Sounds like a great campaign. As long as children are happy, know right from wrong then that's all that matters. Great post. Thanks for linking up to the #BinkyLinky

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    1. Tubbs21 August 2015 at 21:21

      It is a great campaign, mum wars cause so much hurt and upset and most of the time it's completely unnecessary. Thank you both for hosting BinkyLinky each week

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  22. Helen - Blogging Beautifully21 August 2015 at 20:51

    Very well said!! We are all different and all learning at the end of the day :-) Thanks for linking up to the #bestandworst hope you'll pop by again! x

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    1. Tubbs21 August 2015 at 21:28

      Thank you for the lovely comment and for hosting each week. Have a lovely weekend

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  23. Unknown21 August 2015 at 23:34

    Fab post! Life and let life I say :) Thanks for linking up to #TheList x

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    1. Tubbs23 August 2015 at 22:14

      Thank you for the lovely comment and for hosting each week. Have a lovely weekend

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  24. Anonymous22 August 2015 at 12:02

    Everyone should read this post, seriously one of the best posts I have ever read! So grateful you shared this #mummyandus I often feel guilty for parenting choices and this makes me realise how it is silly to be so hard on myself

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    1. Tubbs23 August 2015 at 22:15

      Gosh, that's humbling, thank you.

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  25. Unknown22 August 2015 at 17:46

    Very well said a great post thanks for linking to the Binkylinky

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    1. Tubbs23 August 2015 at 22:15

      Thank you for hosting each week. Have a good weekend

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  26. mumturnedmom22 August 2015 at 22:21

    Great post!

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    1. Tubbs23 August 2015 at 22:15

      Thank you!

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  27. Random Musings23 August 2015 at 19:28

    I totally agree. As long as a child isn't being abused, how their parent(s) choose to raise them is their business, and not for anyone else to judge!
    Thanks for linking up to #AnythingGoes
    Debbie

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    1. Tubbs23 August 2015 at 22:15

      Too right! Thank you for hosting and see you next week. Have a lovely weekend

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  28. Unknown24 August 2015 at 19:07

    I actually read and signed via Talya. I believe all parents should be helping and encouraging one another. We are all parents, we gave birth to these beautiful creatures and all want what is best for them and how we personally go about doing that shouldn't be frowned upon as long as just like you said, "they are fed and loved". Thank you for sharing this with #momsterslink.

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    1. Tubbs25 August 2015 at 12:24

      I wondered if you already had. It's a brilliant movement. Thank you for hosting each week

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  29. Let's Talk Mommy26 August 2015 at 14:59

    Fantastic post couldn't agree more. I think its sad there is ever a war amongst parents like you said no one grows up and says on a resume bottle fed or breastfed so silly. I hate the judging that goes around. Great post. Thanks for linking up to Share With Me. I hope to see you again soon. #sharewithme

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    1. Tubbs30 August 2015 at 22:25

      Thank you for the lovely comment and for hosting each week. Hope you had a wonderful summer

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  30. Unknown27 August 2015 at 14:49

    I'm certainly on the same wavelength! #bigfatlinky

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    1. Tubbs30 August 2015 at 22:25

      Yay! Thank you for hosting each week

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