Having talked about possessions that you only own if you're an official adult, I wondered about some of the things that you only learn when you're an actual grown up.
When I was little, I thought being a grown up would be the best thing ever. You could do whatever you wanted. Although I can do some of the things I want, others not so much. I have to go work, look after Rev T and the Tubblet and clean the house. Although if I wanted to eat Nutella on toast for breakfast washed down with a bucket of coffee every day, then I can.
- You don't know what you're doing. We're all just making it up as we go along and hoping for the best. Even our parents. But when you're little, you think all grown ups have it all totally worked out. Especially your parents.
- The cleaning is never done. No one's house is clean and tidy all the time. There's always housework, washing up or laundry to be done. Then there's the mess fairy ... The mess fairy wanders about the house scattering things in their wake. Usually small, plastic or cuddly things.
- You're tired all the time. However much sleep I get, I'm always tired. It's like a sleep thief comes every night and pinches my sleep. Frankly, I want it back! But when I was younger, I could party all night and still function properly the next day.
- I got bills ... I have to pay ... Or should they be called Williams as some of them are much too unfriendly to be called Bills? And, just when I think I've got them all paid, something unexpected happens and there's a new one. No one mentions bills when you're growing up. Barbie Fashion Fever lets you purchase an outfit by swiping a credit card, "Charge it!" No mention of the bill afterwards or the consequences if Barbie fails to pay for all the pretty pink things. The Tubblet never had one of these. I thought that pretending to buy things on a credit card was a piece of imaginary play too far. Credit cards are great if you clear the balance at the end of each month, but I wasn't sure if I could get a five year old to understand that. It took me long enough!
- Friendships. When I was young, I wanted all the friends. Now, friendships are about quality not quantity. Friends who care, ask how things are and are there through thick and thin. When I was young, I spent all day, every day with my friends. Now, getting everyone together takes endless planning and someone always cancels at the last minute. During the evening out, everyone drinks sensibly and goes home early. We all need the sleep and hangovers last for 3 days instead of 3 minutes. Besides, if you've got children, parenting whilst hungover is grim work. Children know when you're weak.
- Garden centres, Lakeland and ... When I was little, my parents dragged me round garden centres etc and it was the most boring thing in the world. Now, you try getting me out of Lakeland! They've got cake stands and everything says the woman who does not bake.
What things have you learnt since you became a grown-up? (Allegedly)
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